Mulligans

As I’ve said before, I think melanoma and golf have much in common. For example, neither my experiences as a patient nor my golf swing should be duplicated or imitated. Plus I’ve had a mulligan with melanoma and I sure do appreciate getting them on the golf course. (Although since I banished certain fairway woods and long irons from my golf bag, my mulligan addiction has eased just a bit.) And for a player at my low skill level, the U.S.G.A.’s Official Rules of Golf seem every bit as arbitrary and capricious as my insurance company’s regular practice of denying payment for a preauthorized MRI.


There are a lot of hazards on the course I play, but there’s only one that’s completely within my control to avoid-- the intense UV rays at 7500 feet. I’m not counting on getting another melanoma mulligan and, particularly if you play golf, you shouldn’t either.

I’ll leave you with a great ‘safe golf’ video from American Academy of Dermatology and a little twist on The Beach Boys’ classic, “Little Deuce Coupe”…

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZXFFLuoaMzM


Playin’ in woods
I don't know what I shot
Playin’ in woods
You don't know what I shot


Well I'm not braggin' babe and don't put scores down
’Cause I've got the slowest geezer swing in town
With sunscreen all over me I don't ever fry
‘Cause if I had a leather skin tan I know I could die
Yes I’m playin’ in woods
You don't know what I shot
(I’m playin’ in woods)
(You don't know what I shot)


Wear a little golf cap with a long wide bill
And I'll duck a thunderstorm so I don’t get killed
Good-sported and suncreened and most strokes are scored.
I shoot a hundred and forty with my Topflight hoard
Yes I’m hittin’ in woods
You don't know what I shot
(I’m hittin’ in woods)
(You don't know what I shot)


I’ve got a competition clutch when my score matters more
And I putt like a chicken so my three-putts soar
And if that ain’t enough to make you flip your lid
There's one more thing, I got a pale skinned caddy


I’m ‘prayin for the times when ball flight finds green
Then I blow 'em into the water like you never seen
I can’t splash out of sand and those traps I fear
And double bogeys are always near


Yes I’m hittin’ in woods
You don't know what I shot
(I’m hittin in woods)
(You don't know what I shot)
There’s a little goose troop
They don't care what I shot
(A little goose troop)
(They don't care what I shot)
C’s a little noose hoop
You don't know what I got