Stand By Your Tans

For the marketing shills of the tanning salon industry, which sells a known carcinogen to teenagers by lying about the risks of using its product, a new version of Tammy Wynette’s “Stand By Your Man”…



Sometimes it's hard to be a salon
Telling all your lies to sell some tans
You'll sell good times
And they'll buy bad times
Riskin’ things that they don't understand
But if you fool them
You'll bring kids in
Even though C likes to grow from tans
But if they love skin
Oh, be proud of skin
’Cause someday all will want you banned

Stand by your tans
Tell them no harm they’ll come to
And tanning’s good for health too
when nights are cold and wintry

Stand by your tans
And tell the world your truth spin
Keep making all the bucks you can
Tanned hides bring scans

Stand by your tans
And show the world you’re lyin’
Keep making all the dough you can
Tanned hides bring scans