A Slippery Slope

The ski slopes are calling me and, it being spring break time, I’m sure I’ll see a lot of raccoon faces on flatlanders who didn’t wear sunscreen on the slopes. And some out-of-control kamikaze snow riders (usually sporting a Miami Dolphins or Atlanta Falcons jacket) snowplowing or side-skidding down the hill at 30 m.p.h. And at least one Texan trying to order a Corona Light at my favorite local microbrewery, where the bartenders’ usual response is to pour a glass of ice water, smile, and walk away. Ah, the joys of spring.

I’ll sign off with a song for all you spring breakers, Janis Joplin’s “Try (Just a Little Bit Harder)”…

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vU9Dsl89UGo


Fry, fry, fry just a little bit darker
No I don’t love, love, love skin, I hate myself
'Cause I'm gonna fry, oh yeah, just a little bit darker
And I might lose, lose, lose skin to biopsy tests, yeah.
Hey, I don't care how done sun’s gonna bake me
And if it's sunscreen I don't want, no I don't really want it
Yeah if it's UVs I don't want no SP to break me.

Yeah I'm gonna fry, oh yeah, just a little bit darker
So I can give, give, give, give derm every bit of my moles.
I'm gonna fry, oh yeah, just a little bit darker
So I can show, show, show him sun with no control, yeah.
Hey! I don't care how done sun’s gonna bake me
No if it's sunscreen I don't want
No I don't really want it
Yeah if it's UVs I don't want no SP to break me.
Hey, dig it! Yeah! Yeah yeah yeah!
Yeah, yeah, yeah, all right.

Fry oh yeah, hey, fry oh yeah, board, board, board,
fry oh yeah, fry oh yeah, board, board, board,
fry oh yeah yeah, fry, whoa, fry oh yeah, board, board, board,
Shoosh, turn, shoosh, turn, oh yeah, fry, oh yeah hey!
Fry oh yeah, hey fry oh yeah,
Fry more, fry, fry, you ain't frying man
You're not frying out man, come up with it.
Come on, that's a plower that’s missin’ to turn, man.
Hey you gotta turn all right
Hey little girl, gotta shoosh on
You got no speed
Turn a little more, hey, fry a little more,
Green’s a little bore
Yeah, work on, shoosh on, move on, move on,
You gotta work for it, you gotta work on it
Shoosh on, green on, move on,
Move on, hey hey hey.

Turn it fat skis,
Turn it fat skis,
Come on, turn it fat skis, oh
Yeah, yeah, you better fry, fry, fry, fry a little more
You ain't never gonna have any fun if that's the sort of turn you can do.
Shoot, there's lot more talent around than that man.
Fry, fry, fry, fry, fry, fry,
You've gotta fry, fry, fry, fry,
Fry, fry, fry, fry, fry, fry...
You gotta fry, fry, fry, fry...
Board, fry, fry, fry, fry,
Board, fry, fry, fry, fry,
Hey, fry, fry, fry, fry,

Hey, fry oh yeah, fry oh yeah, board, board, board
Fry oh yeah, hey, fry whoa, fry oh yeah
Fry oh yeah, board, board, board, fry oh yeah
Fry oh yeah, hey, hey, hey,
Fry oh yeah, Fry oh yeah,
Board, board, board, snowboard.