Melanoma; It's Tough Enough

Every guest of the Hotel Melanoma cringes when hearing the phrase “it’s just skin cancer”. I heard it from well-meaning friends who hadn’t a clue why I was doing multiple rounds of inpatient biochemotherapy. Looking back to that time, I now think I did a disservice to the melanoma community by banning all hospital visitors. At the time, my wife and I thought we were doing the right thing by sparing family and friends from seeing the alarming visuals of the treatment. Now I realize that I might’ve scared a few people into practicing safe sun had I not hidden from public view. And demonstrated to a few people that melanoma really IS cancer, with treatments that are every bit as ugly as those performed for “real” cancers. I guess that’s why I so admire all the bad ass melanoma warriors who’ve shed their privacy and shared a photographic record of their battles with this beast.

For all of you BAMW’s, here’s a new version of The Fabulous Thunderbirds’ “Tuff Enough”…

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aIhlOjmwHXU


We will block our child from sun tans with ‘screen
Ain't no doubt about it Black C it's you we AIM to seize
We’ve wrestled with some dyin’, hope the public cares
It's black’s time baby, pink we don't wear

Ain't that tuff enuff
Ain't that tuff enuff
Ain't that tuff enuff
Ain't that tuff enuff

For you Black C we would swim in ‘screen
Nothing docs’d do to you that's too tuff for we
We'll call out those burning salons with our bloggin’ harsh words
And not even worry about dishing dirt

Ain't that tuff enuff
Ain't that tuff enuff
Ain't that tuff enuff
Ain't that tuff enuff


We'll treat twenty four hours, seven days a week
Just so we can go home and end C’s streak
We’ll fight you in the morning and we’ll fight you at noon
We’ll fight you all the night and make Black Cancer swoon

Ain't that tuff enuff
Ain't that tuff enuff
Ain't that tuff enuff
Ain't that tuff enuff

We’ll lay in the sights of radiation that C’s earned
And not even worry about getting burned
We’ll drown the entire state in ‘screen, fight insurance with pleas
Just to have you Black C run and flee

Ain't that tuff enuff
Ain't that tuff enuff
Ain't that tuff enuff
Ain't that tuff enuff

Ain't that tuff enuff
Ain't that tuff enuff
Ain't that tuff enuff
Ain't that tuff enuff

Keep Your Tans To Yourself

I’ll be heading to southern latitudes later this month to spend some beach time among the leather people, where I’m sure my phosphorescent white look and Yankee beach attire will draw some curious looks. Whatever, I really don’t care, and I just dare some weathered old bag in a thong bikini to inquire why I’m practicing safe sun. But I just had to write myself some music to sing along to while sipping something cool in the shade of a palapa hut.

To the tune of the Georgia Satellites “Keep Your Hands To Yourself”…

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PdpAop7gp0w&feature=related


I got a lotta scans on my docket going jingle lingle ling
Want to call doc on the telephone baby he’ll tell you some things
But each time I walk I see the same old thing
Always no safe sun no screenin’ until I get to Yankee wing
My honey my baby don't put your life upon no shelf
I said don't hand me no fries and keep your tans to yourself

Fool baby baby baby why you want to treat thee this way
You know I'm still a living boy I still reel from tan days
That's when I told her my story 'bout these meds made by Dow
And she said no safe sun no ‘screenin’ until she look like leather cow
My honey my baby don't put your life upon no shelf
I said don't hand me no fries and keep your tans to yourself

You see she wanted her tan bad and I was about to give in
That's when I started talkin' tough love started talkin' about skin
I said honey C lives with you for the rest of your life
She said no safe sun no screenin’ until she feels those sharp knives
My honey my baby don't put your life on no shelf
Please don't hand me no fries and keep your tans to yourself.

Miracles

A heart-wrenching facet of networking in the online melanoma community is that death abounds. Good, funny, tough, and courageous folks who’ve received the best available treatment and the prayers of scores of loved ones, and fought like hell every step of the way, still succumb to this damn disease. But every so often one hears a story of seemingly miraculous healing and recovery. Is divine intervention at work in these tales?

My own views on that theological question are a muddled mix of hope, skepticism, and an uncertain faith. If prayers for healing work some times, then why is the answer to such prayers some times “no”? Is God even a micromanager to this degree?

I’ve had one experience that caused me to ponder about the healing power of prayer that I’ve never before shared with a single soul. I was incarcerated in the hospital following extensive neurosurgery to take a first whack at Mr. Schwannoma, and was experiencing some very intense pain and precious little relief from a morphine pump. A lay minister stopped by to offer me communion (which I declined for reasons I won’t go into here) but she nevertheless offered to pray for me. I accepted. I don’t recall a word she spoke but she laid her hand on my head as she prayed. Almost immediately, I experienced a warming, calming and soothing effect and the pain subsided to the point I quickly fell asleep. Was it just a coincidence, with pain meds finally kicking in at the time, or was something more going on there? All I know for sure is that I’d like to think it was the latter.

Maybe, just maybe, healing miracles really do happen. To the tune of The Moody Blues’ “I Know You’re Out There Somewhere”…

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cjImFYf2Vzc


I know they're out there somewhere
Somewhere, somewhere
I know we'll find them somehow
Somehow, somehow
And somehow they will heal the pain in you

C’s mist is drifting slowly
I can’t see the way ahead
And I've left behind the empty treats
That once inspired my life
And the strength of the emotion
Is like thunder in the air
'Cos the promise that I’ve made this cancer
Haunts me to the end

I know they’re out there somewhere
Somewhere, somewhere
I know they're out there somewhere
Somewhere You can hear our voice
I know we'll find You somehow
Somehow, somehow
I know we'll find You somehow
And somehow You'll begin our lives anew

The secrets of life’s beauty
And the mysteries of our souls
I've been searching for in every post I read
And the times I've been quite taken
It's impossible to say
And no grass is growing
Underneath our feet

I know they're out there somewhere
Somewhere, somewhere
I know they're out there somewhere
Somewhere You can hear our voice
I know we'll find You somehow
Somehow, somehow
I know we'll find You somehow
And somehow You'll begin our lives anew

You see I know cure's out there somewhere
O yes I know cure's out there somewhere
You see I know we'll find cures somehow
O yes I know we'll find cures somehow

The words that I remember
From my childhood still are true
That there's none so blind
As those who will not see
And to those who lack the courage
And say it's dangerous to try
Well they just don't know
That hope eternal will not be denied

I know they're out there somewhere
Somewhere, somewhere
I know they're out there somewhere
Somewhere You can hear our voice
I know we’ll find cures somehow
Somehow, somehow
I know we'll find cures somehow
And somehow we'll begin our lives

Yes I know it's going to happen
I can feel cure getting near
And soon we'll be returning
To the fountain of our youth
And if you wake up wondering
In the darkness He'll be there
His arms will close around you
And protect you with the truth

I know cure’s out there somewhere
Somewhere, somewhere
I know cure’s out there somewhere
Somewhere You can hear our voice
I know we'll find cures somehow
Somehow, somehow
I know we'll find cures somehow
And somehow we'll return to life anew

Mama Told Me

For Rev. Carol, who’s used the line a time or two, the Hotel Melanoma version of Three Dog Night’s “Mama Told Me”…

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rKaQzQAlNn4


Want some saline ‘stead of water?
Yervoy by IV?
What's all these hazy answers they're givin' me?
This is the craziest Hotel that could ever be
Don't turn on the lights 'cause I don't wanna see

Mama told me not to sun
Mama told me not to sun
"That ain't the way to have fun, no"

Open up the window, let some air into this room
I think I'm almost croakin' from your spell of doom and gloom
And those statistics you're quotin' 'bout scare me half to death
Open up the window, doctor, let me catch my breath

Mama told me not to sun
Mama told me not to sun
"That ain't the way to have fun, son"
"That is the way to be done, son"

The rad chemo is blastin', someone’s fallin’ on the floor
I'm lookin' at my nurse aide - she's running out the door
I seen so many things I ain't never seen before
Don't know what it is - I don't want this C no more

Mama told me not to sun
Mama told me not to sun
She said, "That ain't the way to have fun, son"

"That ain't the way to have fun, no"
"That ain't the way to have fun, no"
"That ain't the way to have fun, son"
"That ain't the way to have fun, no"
"That is the way to be done, son"

"That ain't the way to have fun, no"
"That ain't the way to have fun, son"
"That ain't the way to have fun, no"
"That is the way to be done, son"

If You're Feeling 'Moody Blue'

A request, The Moody Blues’ “Nights In White Satin”…

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9muzyOd4Lh8


Nights of fright whackin’, never reaching the end,
Nurse calls I'm hittin’, never meaning to send.
Beauty I'd always missed with those fries before.
Just where my youth went, I can't say anymore.

'Cos docs drug you, yes docs drug you, oh how docs drug you.

Gazing at people, some tannin’ fans,
Just what we’re going through they can't understand.
Some try to tell we, thoughts they cannot defend,
Just what they want to see, they will see in their friends.

And I’m drugged new, yes I’m drugged new,
Oh how I’m drugged new, oh how I’m drugged new.

Frights if moles blacken, ever preaching tan’s end,
Blog posts I've written, ever keen to offend
Beauty is ‘screenin’ mist, not those fries before.
Just what C’s truth is, I will say evermore.

'Cos I’m drugged blue, yes I’m drugged blue,
Oh how I’m drugged blue, oh how I’m drugged blue.
'Cos I’m drugged blue, yes I’m drugged blue,
Oh how I’m drugged blue, oh how I’m drugged blue.

Breath deep
The gathering gloom
Watch tans made
In UV ray tubes
Bed quitter people
Look back and lament
Another day's foolish
tanning was spent

Addicted sun lovers’
Hassle will come
Stage III man cries for cure
And has none
New mother picks up
And sunblocks her son
Senior citizens
Wish skin was young

Cold hearted nodes
That duel this plight
Remove black cancer
From our sight
Dead’s not gay, it’s
Yervoy’s fight
But who decides
Which drug’s right
And
When it’s for infusin’