Senior Moments

I’ve been playing quite a lot of geezer golf this summer (rather badly, I should add) while succeeding in maintaining a death row inmate standard of paleness. But just the other day upon completion of another ‘soaring’ round I noticed that I was rather sunburned. This puzzled me more than a little. I could have sworn that I’d applied my usual copious dose of sunscreen before hitting the links. But on closer inspection of the bottle of lotion I’d tapped that morning, I discovered that I’d managed to use a zero SPF moisturizing lotion from a container that looked only somewhat like my bottle of sunscreen. Should’ve had the reading glasses on, I guess. Oy. Fortunately, my next toga party with a dermatologist is several weeks away and I’ll have ample time to pale out by then and avoid any stern lectures.

I’ll sign off with another ode to sunscreen, to the tune of “This Magic Moment” from Jay and The Americans…


This tragic moment
So different and so new
Was like any other
Until I missed you
And then it happened
It took me by surprise
I knew that you felt it too
By the look of my fries
Keep the pale hide (keep the pale hide)
Softer than the summer blight (softer than the summer blight)
Everything I wanna have (everything, everything)
Whenever I rolled you right
This magic moment (this magic moment)
When my swings are all online
Won’t last forever
Forever till the end of nine
(this magic moment)
Whoa-oh-oh-oh-oh
Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh
(this magic moment)
Oh-oh-oh-oh
Keep the pale hide (keep the pale hide)
Softer than the summer blight (softer than the summer blight)
Everything I wanna have (everything, everything)
Whenever I rolled you right
This magic moment (this magic moment)
While my swings are all on line
Won’t last forever (this magic moment)
Forever till the end of nine (magic)
Whoa-oh-oh-oh-oh (magic)
Whoa-oh-oh-oh-oh (magic)
Oh-oh-oh-oh (moment)
Oh-oh-oh-oh (magic)
Oh-oh-oh-oh (magic)
Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh (magic)
Oh-oh-oh-oh (moment)
Magic, oh-oh-oh
Magic, oh-oh-oh