It's 5 O'Clock Somewhere

Each time I was incarcerated in the hospital for biochemotherapy treatments, the plan was to finish my fourth 24-hour round of infusion midday Friday and to discharge me around 5 p.m. As you might imagine, if I was conscious and coherent I spent Friday afternoon watching the clock and waiting for the medics to come in and tell me I was good to go. There’s just no better song to borrow to express my fervent desire to get the heck out of there than Alan Jackson’s and Jimmy Buffett’s “It’s 5 O’Clock Somewhere”…

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BPCjC543llU


My head is hot and that ol' clock is movin' slow
And so am I
This day passes like molasses in wintertime
But it's for life
Gettin' drugged every hour and older by the minute
Those docs have pushed me over the limit
I'd like to call them somethin'
But think I'll just call it a day

Give me somethin' small and strong
Make it an Ativan before I go get tanned
It's only half past twelve, but I don't care
It's five o'clock somewhere

These four bags are gonna take all afternoon
And half the night
Tomorrow morning I know there'll be hell to pay
Hey, but that's my plight
I ain't had a day off here, it feels like a year
My infusion vacation is gonna start right here
If that bag’s for me
You can tell 'em I've just ran away

Give me somethin' small and strong
Make it an Ativan before I go get tanned
It's only half past twelve, but I don't care
It's five o'clock somewhere

I could pay off my tab
Call myself up a cab and be out of here before 2
At a moment like this, I can't help but wonder
What would Jimmy Buffett do?

Jimmy: Funny you should ask, Alan
I'd say
Give me somethin' small and strong
Make it an Ativan before I go get tanned
It's only half past twelve, but I don't care

Give me somethin' small and strong
Make it an Ativan before I go get tanned
It's only half past twelve, but I don't care
He don't care
And I don't care
It's five o'clock somewhere

Jimmy: What time zone am I on?
What hospital ward am I in?

Alan: It doesn't matter

It's five o'clock somewhere

Jimmy: It's always on five in Melanomaville, come to think of it

Alan: I heard that

Jimmy: You've been there haven't you?

Alan: Yes, Sir

Jimmy: I've seen your chart there

Alan: I've been to Melanomaville a few times

Jimmy: All right.
That's bad

Alan: Battled my way back

Jimmy: OK Just want to make sure you can beat that mystical
oncological median

Alan: Beyond the peak.
I got it

Jimmy: All right.

It's five o'clock.
Let's go somewhere

Alan: I'm ready.
Crank it up

Jimmy: Let's get out of here

Alan: I'm gone