The "I Believe" Button

A lot of folks at The Hotel Melanoma have participated in clinical trials. In my case, it was neoadjuvant biochemotherapy following a Stage IIIc diagnosis with fourteen malignant lymph nodes. I’ve since learned that I seem to be a member of a fairly small club, because some (and maybe a lot of) melanoma docs see biochemo as the equivalent of using a flamethrower to defrost a refrigerator. They’re entitled to their opinion, but it apparently worked for me and I’d do it again in a heartbeat. Better living through toxic chemistry…


One of my neighbors is a former test pilot. He once told me that in that line of work there comes a time when a pilot has to punch the “I Believe” button and trust that the aircraft will do what its designers say it will do-- and be the first, and possibly last, pilot to put the aircraft through a particular maneuver. I chuckled and responded that I thought that perhaps I did something similar when electing to participate in a clinical trial.

For all of you who’ve punched the “I Believe” button, here’s my version of The Youngbloods’ “Get Together”…

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OCiLxRCBf40&feature=fvwrel




Cure is what we long to bring,
And fear's what makes us try
You can quake in loud scan ring
Or make the bad cells die
Know the drug is on the thing
And you need not know why


C'mon people now,
Trials are one mother
Everybody get together
Try one drug or another right now


Some will come and some will go
C shall surely pass
When the one that left us here
Returns for us at last
We are but a moment in time
Fading into past


C'mon people now,
Trials are one mother
Everybody get together
Try one drug or another right now


C'mon people now,
Trials are one mother
Everybody get together
Try one drug or another right now


C'mon people now,
Trials are one mother
Everybody get together
Try one drug or another right now

If you hear the song I sing,
You must under-tan
You hold the key to health and years
All in your trembling hand
Just sunscreen unlocks them both
It's there at your command


C'mon people now,
Trials are one mother
Everybody get together
Try one drug or another right now


C'mon people now,
Trials are one mother
Everybody get together
Try one drug or another right now


C'mon people now,
Trials are one mother
Everybody get together
Try one drug or another right now

Right now
Right now!

Simply So Resistible

Just The Hotel Melanoma rendition of Robert Palmer’s “Simply Irresistible”…


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UrGw_cOgwa8


How can it be permissible
C compromised my pigment cells, yeah yeah
Safe kind of sun is mythical
C’s tanning thing that’s typical


C’s a craze you’d remorse, C’s a powerful force
You’re obliged to get dosed when there’s no other course
Tan used to look good to me, but now I find it


Simply so resistible
Simply so resistible


C’s cunning is so powerful, Huh
It’s simply sun-avoidable Oh, oh
Pale trend is irreversible
This mole man’s not invincible


C’s a natural law, and C leaves me in awe
C deserves my applause, won't surrender because
C tried to get rid of me, but now I find it


Simply so resistible
Simply so resistible


Simply so resistible C’s not kind, there’s no tellin’ where my money went
Simply so resistible C’s land mine, there’s another way to go


C’s so avoidable, protect against old Sol
C gives me feelings like I never felt before
C’s taking prom misses, C’s quaking UV awe
Tan used to look good to me now I find it


Simply so resistible C’s not kind, there’s no tellin’ where my money went
Simply so resistible C’s land mine, there’s another way to go Whoa


C’s methods are inscrutable
The proof is irrefutable, ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh
C’s so completely missable, huh
Our lives are irreplacable Whoa yeah


C’s a craze you’d remorse, C’s a powerful force
You’re obliged to get dosed when there’s no other course
Well tan used to look good to me, but now I find it


Simply so resistible C’s not kind, there’s no tellin’ where my money went
Simply so resistible C’s land mine, there’s another way to go


Simply so resistible C’s not kind, there’s no tellin’ where my money went
Simply so resistible C’s land mine, there’s another way to go


Simply so resistible

Pink Fatigue Rock

I’ll confess that I find all cancer “awareness” campaigns, including my own little Quixotic efforts, to be slightly annoying. I don’t think any awareness campaigner, including myself, really believes that “their” cancer is any more important and deserving of funding than anyone else’s. But the message I get when forced to watch a bunch of NFL hulks running around in pink cleats is that pink matters, black doesn’t. The unfortunate truth is that everyone living at The Hotel Carcinoma is, directly or indirectly, competing in a race for research bucks for their personal brand of cancer that lives depend on. More awareness, more donations. It’s really that simple.


On November 17, a respectable number of residents of The Hotel Melanoma will be participating in a run/walk event in Charlotte, North Carolina to raise funds for Aim at Melanoma.  I suspect our little band will be dwarfed by the pink hoards we’ll all be seeing in Pinktober, but it’s a start. If you can join us, please do. If you can’t, please sponsor a participant.

Just in case we need another rock anthem for November, here’s my version of The Rolling Stones’ “Paint it Black”…

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n1zBG2TEjn4&feature=related

I see a pink hoard and I want it painted black
No colors anymore I want them to turn black
I see the girls jog by dressed in their runnin’ clothes
I have to turn my head until awareness grows


I see long line of scars and they're all tainted black
With warriors and my sun both never to come back
I see people turn their heads and quickly look away
Like the U-born Black C it just happens every day


I look inside myself and see my heart’s with black
I see hot pink hoard and must have it painted black
Maybe then I'll fade away and not have to raise greenbacks
It's not easy palin' up when your whole world is black


No more will my envy go burn at pinker hues
I could just foresee this thing happening to you


If I work hard enough into November run
My docs will laugh at C before the mournin' comes


I see a pink hoard and I want it painted black
No colors anymore I want them to turn black
I see the girls jog by dressed in their runnin’ clothes
I have to turn my head until awareness grows


Hmm, hmm, hmm,...


I wanna see it painted, painted black
Black as night, black as coal
I wanna see the sun blotted out from the sky
I wanna see it painted, painted, painted, painted black


Yeah!


Hmm, hmm, hmm,...

Mercolanoma Rap

It’s been a while since I’ve done one for my favorite snake oil salesman and purveyor of carcinogens, ‘Dr.’ Mercolanoma. Wishing you all a joyous and sun-safe Independence Day, here’s The Hotel Melanoma version of George Thorogood & The Destroyers’ “Who Do You Love”…


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C5Aabx80gV4&feature=related



You’ve blogged forty-seven kinds of cow pies, you got a cobra snake for a website
A grand big house on the rich side, and it's a-made out of teenage kids’ hide
Got your brand of UV that you sell non-stop, and it's a-made lots of humans skulls
Come on have a little talk with Doc Ozzy, and tell me U do you love!
U do you love!
You do you love!


Now to hound the brown you use your rattlesnake lips, make it sleazy Joey won't you give me health tips
U do you love!
You do you love!


You’ve got a tombstone hand and a graveyard mind, you lust money’s hue and you don't mind lying
U do you love!
U do you love!
You do you love!


Mercola hook a-me by fine scam, he said " brown some, gorge, you can’t under-tan,
U do you love!"
His hide were dark and his lies just flew, “brown the healthy way with home tan bed new”
Get a bump ‘cause nobody ‘screened, you should've turned your hide green
U do you love!
You do you love!
U do you love!
You do you love!


Yeah, you’ve got a tombstone hand and a graveyard mind, lust money’s hue baby you don't mind lying
Baked skin blues, Doc C sell them on the street, hawk your sunshine toxics and your mole deadly treat
Yeah, U do you love!
You do you love!


You’ve blogged forty-seven kinds of cow pies, you got a cobra snake for a website
A grand big house on the rich side, and it's a-made out of teenage kids’ hide
Got your brand of UV that you sell non-stop, and it's a-made lots of humans skulls
Come on have a little talk with Doc Ozzy, and tell me U do you love!
U do you love!
You do you love!

Navel Gazing Rock

It’s July 1 and Aim at Melanoma is telling me it’s time to do my monthly skin self-exam. I know these folks mean well, but I’ll pass. For one thing, I don’t like to look at my worn old carcass any more than I have to to shave etc. And for another, don’t these folks understand that we mole-covered paranoid hypochondriacs at The Hotel Melanoma are almost constantly obsessing over whether some spot on our hides is changing? Meh.


From Tom Petty & The Heartbreakers’, “You Wreck Me”…

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B8m5p6V_NPQ&feature=related



Surprised I’m ‘live, nine years on
Surprised I’m pale, like my SPF strong
Infuse me, should C come ‘round
If I stay too long in Hotel town


Oh, yeah, you wreck me, Black C
You make me sing blues
But you move me, Sun C
Yes, you do


Now and again I get the feeling
Well if I don't win, I'm a gonna break even
Rescue me, should C go wrong
If it digs too deep, if it stays too long


Oh, yeah, you wreck me, Black C
You make me sing blues
But you move me, Sun C
Yes, you do


I'll be the boy in the SPF pants
You need a cure, that’s the vic’try dance
Sunscreen me, wherever I go
Docs play dumb, whatever they know


Oh, yeah, you wreck me, Black C
You make me sing blues
But you move me, Sun C
Yes, you do