I finally stopped procrastinating and made an appointment with my favorite university hospital dermatology clinic (where I don’t compete with tattoo removals and other cosmetic stuff for an appointment slot). So next month it’ll be time to get naked in front of young female dermatology residents who look to me like they’re young enough to be my granddaughters. I should feel sorry for these kids for having to make a close inspection of my tattered and unprepossessing carcass. But I don’t, because they chose this line of work and on completion of their residency training will be making the big bucks. And some melanoma researcher friends have placed dibs on any melanoma tissue samples I may spawn in the future, so if I have a new primary at least some good may come out of this appointment.
Looking forward to having the most fun an old fellow can hope to have in public without risking an indecent exposure charge, I’ll sign off with The Hotel Melanoma rendition of Joan Jett’s “I Love Rock ‘n’ Roll”…
I saw her standin' there by the mole map machine
I knew she must a been about seventeen
Heart beat was goin' strong
Wearin' my fav’ sarong
An' I could tell it wouldn't be long
Till she was with me, yeah me,
An' I could tell it wouldn't be long
Till she was with me, yeah me, singin'
I love Doctor Mole
So put some younger eyes on my boondocks, baby
I love Doctor Mole
So come an' take your time an' lance at me
She smiled so I got up and asked for her name
That don't matter, she said,
'Cause “Skin Doc”’s nickname
Said can I show you mole where C can be ingrown
An' next we removin' on
She was with me, yeah me
Next we removin' on
She was with me, yeah me singin'
I love Doctor Mole
So put some younger eyes on my boondocks, baby
I love Doctor Mole
So come an' take your time an' lance at me
Said can I show you mole where C can be ingrown
Next we're viewin' on
She was with me, yeah me
And we'll be viewin' on
An' singin' that same old song
Yeah with me, singin'
I love Doctor Mole
So put some younger eyes on my boondocks, baby
I love Doctor Mole
So come an' take your time an' lance at me
I love Doctor Mole
So put some younger eyes on my boondocks, baby
I love Doctor Mole
So come an' take your time an' lance at me
I love Doctor Mole
So put some younger eyes on my boondocks, baby
I love Doctor Mole
So come an' take your time an' lance at me
I love Doctor Mole
So put some younger eyes on my boondocks, baby
I love Doctor Mole
So come an' take your time an' lance at me
I love Doctor Mole
So put some younger eyes on my boondocks, baby
I love Doctor Mole
So come an' take your time an' lance at me
I love Doctor Mole
So put some younger eyes on my boondocks, baby
I love Doctor Mole
So come an' take your time an' lance at me
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